If you’ve missed some of the daily readings in the 12 days of Christmas series you will find a complete set here.
CHRISTMAS JOURNEY
The Twelve Days of Christmas
Twelve Steps in the Journey of Prayer
(adapted from The Journey of the Magi by Chris Erdman)
WELCOME TO A SACRED JOURNEY
The Twelve Days of Christmas are largely forgotten today. If they are remembered they’re remembered as a song about “Lord’s a leaping,” and “partridges in a pear tree.” The Twelve Days, traditionally December 25 – January 5, are the true Christmas, the Christmas not of preparation for a single holiday, but of opening our hearts increasingly to the God who entered our world as a baby.
These Twelve Days are also an invitation to open further to the Light coming into the world in Emmanuel, God-With-Us. And so, the Twelve Days are a journey into prayer, a season set at the beginning of the year that helps deepen our experience with God in the midst of daily life, embracing the sacred in the ordinary tasks of emails and grocery shopping, sitting in a tent on holiday or running kids here and there.
At the beginning of the Twelve Days stands the birth of Christ – that great eruption of light and life into the ordinariness of human routines, a slowly expanding fire kindled at the cross-roads of East and West, North and South. The end of these Twelve Days hosts the celebration of Epiphany, a word that means “manifestations” in Greek. Epiphany centres on the story of the wise men, or Magi, who journeyed from the east to welcome the Christ.
The Magi stand for those who come to the Light, those awakened by the Light – enlightened in the true sense of the word. They stand for those who return to their daily lives changed, bearers of the Light where ever they may be.
Today, I begin my journey into prayer. I turn from all the preparations for Christmas, and instead of closing the door on Christmas as so many will, I open my heart to the Eternal Light of God, willing to go wherever the Light should lead me.
(summarised from Chris Erdman, The Journey of the Magi)
Using the Prayer Journey:
Set aside twelve days to walk this journey. Perhaps begin on Boxing Day.
Each day find some space alone. Read the scripture verses.
Perhaps journal your hopes and fears, questions and insights.
Use the prayers as a springboard for your own conversation with God.
Try the suggested ways of praying.
Take a few minutes to be still, listen, and be with God.
And enjoy the journey!
THE FIRST WAY: AWARENESS
After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, Magi from the east came to Jerusalem and asked, “Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star in the east and have come to worship him.” Matthew 2:1-2
All they saw was a star, a hint of something new, something inviting. Yet that distant light started them out on a journey. The Magi could not know where such a journey would take them, what it would ask of them or how it would change them. All they had was a sign worth following… a beginning.
Christmas marks the coming of a great Light into a dark world. There is a kind of restlessness in every human heart as if we are each on a journey, seeking to find the source of this great Light. Becoming aware of this light is the beginning of prayer. Knowing there is something worth following is the first step.
Lord, open my eyes.
Awaken a great desire in me to find You.
Help me turn towards the Light that has come into the world.
Show me that there is more to see, more to know.
Aware of my need I start this new journey,
All I need to take is the first step.
Think back over this year. What hints or glimpses
of God have prompted you to seek Him?
What might be a ‘concrete’ first step to help you
Journey towards the Light?
THE SECOND WAY: AWAKENING
After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, Magi from the east came to Jerusalem and asked, “Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.” When King Herod heard this he was disturbed, and all Jerusalem with him. When he had called together all the people’s chief priests and teachers of the law, he asked them where the Messiah was to be born. “In Bethlehem in Judea,” they replied, “for this is what the prophet has written: “‘But you, Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, are by no means least among the rulers of Judah; for out of you will come a ruler who will shepherd my people Israel.’”
Then Herod called the Magi secretly and found out from them the exact time the star had appeared. He sent them to Bethlehem and said, “Go and make a careful search for the child. As soon as you find him, report to me, so that I too may go and worship him.” After they had heard the king, they went on their way, and the star they had seen when it rose went ahead of them until it stopped over the place where the child was. When they saw the star, they were overjoyed. On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. Matthew 2:1-11
We are not told why the Magi began this long surprising journey. Perhaps it included dissatisfaction with life, a longing for something more. But what light they saw was enough to cause them to leave everything behind and place their hope in the unknown.
Today is an opportunity to look long and hard at who we are, at what we want. We may realise that we aren’t where we had hoped to be, or our relationships aren’t what we’d hoped they would be. Perhaps the pace of life has squeezed out all our joy.
Part of awakening is taking a long, sometimes painful look in the mirror and deciding old answers and old habits aren’t bringing us closer to the Light. Crisis or disillusionment may be the very door that opens up the path leading to God.
Lord, wake me up.
Help me be honest with myself and with You.
Let me use my disappointments to push me out in search of You.
Taking steps towards You may be the bravest,
and the wisest journey I ever make.
Ask the question, what might need to be “left behind”
as I set out on this journey?
List your disappointments or disillusionments; offer them to God, then burn the list.
THE THIRD WAY: COMPANIONSHIP
Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Hebrews 10:23-24
Setting out on a journey into the unknown can feel a bit risky. But perhaps it is a risk worth taking rather than becoming stuck in the familiar and the comfortable, and missing the adventure that the great Light is calling you into. There is an Irish proverb that says “You have to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was!” This has to be your own journey. You have to step out to follow the Star even if you feel all alone. But companions will appear along the way. Not because you seek them out, or choose them, but because the Holy Spirit knows the encouragement you need and knows those who are travelling the same journey. Keep an open mind and an open heart and you will discover others whose hearts have been captured by the light of the Star.
Most surprisingly, the One you are journeying towards, the Light which may seem so far off is, in fact, journeying alongside you, your constant companion.
Lord, the journey can seem lonely.
Help me to remember that you accompany my every step.
Give me courage to keep walking.
When I can’t see the way
Let me hear you whisper “I am the Way”
I will trust you to provide the companions I need.
Thank you that you will encourage me through others.
Let me be willing to listen and open to learn.
Teach me to be a helpful companion to other travellers.
Who might I share my journey with?
Am I willing to accept help and encouragement?
Is there someone who is finding the journey hard going that I could encourage?
THE FOUTH WAY: WONDER
At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure”. Luke 10:21
There is something in the way little children embrace the world that Jesus commended, a way of seeing that grown-ups may have to relearn. Living with a sense of wonder is something that slips away from us as we grow older. What a privilege to watch a child in wide-eyed wonder as they enter the Christmas Grotto, or marvel at a magic show. Our world-weary sophistication robs us of the ability to live in awe and reverence, to behold mystery, and be left speechless before the greatness of God. Little children teach us something about embracing the wonder of life without having to work out all the answers.
Desert journeys are dusty and stony and dry. The journey may make us weary and in need of refreshing. Just as camels need water every now and then along the way, so our prayers need beauty to lift our vision and thrill our souls. Encountering beauty, taking time to drink in something splendid, is a way to recapture a sense of wonder. Beauty can turn our prayers from request lists to wide-eyed wonder and thanksgiving. Through awe-struck wonder we open our hearts to the God.
Lord, help me be attentive to the beauty you bring across my path.
Keep me from being so preoccupied that I miss your fingerprints,
expressions of beauty that speak of Your greatness.
Teach me to see with new eyes,
Lead me beyond words
To silent awe and worship
Am I allowing time to just look?
Do I value beauty in my environment?
Try being with God by focusing on a single flower,
or a sunset, or a piece of art.
THE FIFTH WAY: WALKING
So Moses thought, “I will go over and see this strange sight—why the bush does not burn up.” When the LORD saw that he had gone over to look, God called to him from within the bush, “Moses! Moses!” And Moses said, “Here I am.” “Do not come any closer,” God said. “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.” Then he said, “I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob.” Exodus 3:3-6
Rather than walking, many of us seem to live life at racing speed! We occupy our minds with concerns over the future or regrets from the past. We fill our thoughts with imagining experiences yet to come. But this is not where real life is to be lived and it is not where we encounter God. Jesus was very clear that worrying about tomorrow was futile, that God meets us in the here and the now – on the very ground where we now stand.
A good spiritual exercise is to pay attention to the ground where we walk. Awaken our senses to the sand between our toes, the softness of the carpet or the tickling grass. Becoming aware of walking on this earth, present to this moment, helps us to be watchful for God meeting us on the common ground of day to day life.
Lord, I don’t want to miss today
because my mind is preoccupied with tomorrow.
I don’t want to cloud today
with sadness or anger from the past.
You are the ever present God.
Help me to be present, increasingly aware of your presence.
Even as I keep going on this journey towards You
It is now that I meet You.
Even today, I may be walking on holy ground.
Practise being fully aware of your surroundings,
watch how often your mind wanders off into the future.
Focus on where you walk, what you feel.
Thank God that this is the very spot where He
can meet you.
THE SIXTH WAY: DESERT
Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness
and speak tenderly to her. Hosea 2:14
Journeying through the desert means entering new territory. Familiar landmarks disappear. What once worked when the going was easy and comfortable suddenly seems to have dried up and become like sand in your mouth. Following the Light of the Star has meant letting go of the known and familiar. The further you go there is a growing anticipation of discovery, but the strangeness of a new landscape is also unnerving.
All travellers who seek God inevitably seem to pass through desert experience. This isn’t God abandoning you, but God stripping away all that is unimportant, teaching you to trust Him more fully. God is actually leading you, only there may be no awareness of His presence. Even in the desert, there is a promise that He will speak tenderly. This was the experience of Abraham, Jesus, St John of the Cross, Mother Theresa and people who sit beside you in church.
Lord, the desert frightens me.
It feels like I have lost my way
and You are nowhere to be found.
I have not walked this way before,
But I can be encouraged by knowing that many others have.
I will choose to keep putting one foot in front of the other,
trusting that I’m still heading toward You.
Read one of the Psalms suggested and like the writer
look back at how God has been faithful in the past.
Trust is only needed when there are unanswered
questions. What might trust look like for you right now?
Talk with God about your ‘uncertain’ places.
THE SEVENTH WAY: WORDS
Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few. Ecclesiastes 5:2
This whole journey has been about prayer. Awareness, awakening, desiring, stepping out, walking. All along the way there has been conversation with God. Words of commitment and words of request, perhaps even words of desperation. And this is good. But prayer is also more than words. So often it is easy to reduce our time with God to a list of wants and needs when what God longs to give us is a growing sense of his presence, an awakening in our heart that cannot be put into words.
We form words and then they form us! A danger of relying on words is that we are limited by them – and then we limit the things we name. If we can attach a label to something it gives us a sense of mastery over it. Perhaps that is part of the reason for God’s self-disclosure to Moses in calling Himself “I Am Who I Am” Ex 3:14. God cannot and should not be pinned down by labels or titles. God is always more.
Even words from the Bible can fill up the spaces, the silence that is needed to become comfortable with God. So speaking to God may begin with a few words, a few verses of the Bible. But these are only the kindling that can start a fire. A fire of love, burning in your heart.
Lord, I reply so much on my words.
They make me feel as if I am in control.
Help me kindle a fire in my heart that will grow
as I learn to know You and love You.
Teach me to grow comfortable in the silence,
that we can share space together.
When I let go of my words, we can meet in my heart.
Luke tells us the Mary ‘pondered these things in her heart’
Spend a few minutes holding one word or one thought.
Let it sink from your mind to your heart.
Is silence something uncomfortable, that you feel the need to fill?
Try enjoying a little silence, as if it were a comforting blanket wrapped around you, creating a safe space.
THE EIGHTH WAY: HUMILITY
My heart is not proud, LORD, my eyes are not haughty; I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. But I have calmed myself
and quieted my ambitions. I am like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child I am content. Psalm 131:1-2
As we continue our prayer journey we discover that knowing God and knowing ourselves must go hand in hand. The growing anticipation of the journey towards God has encouraged you to spend a few minutes in quiet prayer. But as soon as you quieten yourself, your mind starts darting all around the place, jumping from one thought to another. Forgotten errands, pressing duties, distracting noises dance in your head like chattering monkeys in a banana tree. You have come face to face with the ‘you’ who wants to stay in control. The ‘you’ who likes to manage everything - and who does a pretty good job – but thinks it is God. It’s been said that humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less. And humbling this ‘you’, this ego who thinks it is in charge, is essential on the journey to seeking God. But it is anything but easy. God will put up with many things – but not with being given second place. When you begin to seek God, to make space for Him, this little internal manager will start screaming, trying to distract and divert. Pulling your thoughts this way and that it desperately tries to regain centre stage.
So distraction in prayer is not a sign of failure. You are on the right path and just need to concentrate on the Light. Allow it to grow and the internal ‘manager’ will become humbled. Let distractions gently float by without struggling with them. This is always a challenge, but it is precisely here that the battle for holiness is fought and won.
Lord, I want to pray,
I want to be still and know You.
But now I find my mind seems to have a life of its own
and does not easily submit to my own intentions.
But my mind isn’t to rule the roost.
Help me become like a child content to rest
in its mother’s arms.
Have paper handy to write down things that spring
to mind when you pray so you can deal with them later.
Distractions are like leaves floating along a river. You can
choose to pick them up and look at them but also put them
down and let them float on by.
THE NINTH WAY: DARKNESS
Who among you fears the LORD and obeys the word of his servant? Let those who walk in the dark, who have no light, trust in the name of the LORD and rely on their God. Isaiah 50:10-11
Christmas marks the coming of Christ’s Light into a dark world. It divides history in two and initiates a new way of God being-with-us. You glimpsed the Star, and awakened with fresh hope, left everything behind, setting out on the journey that truly matters; find the light whatever the cost.
Journeys at night can be confusing and unsettling. The road is harder to see, the terrain can surprise you, and you may lose all sense of direction. But you didn’t expect the darkness, a kind of death. Out here, between all that’s left behind and the Light you seek, it is night. Much of the journey of prayer is spent here – in between, in the dark. Instead of growing clarity you have more questions, you seem more aware of God’s absence than God’s presence. The saints will tell you that darkness s necessary on the spiritual journey. The self-manager in you knows what to do in the light, but it is lost in the dark. This is where you must learn to trust your heart, to find Christ dwelling there. Learn to be led without seeing, without knowing the way. You will be tempted to turn around, to look for lesser lights for comfort, to create light for yourself. But if you press on, letting go of all props and pretensions, all assumptions and preconceptions you will find what you are looking for.
Lord, not being able to see ahead has sometimes
stopped me moving forward at all.
I do feel afraid, and want to reach for something familiar.
The dark forces me to look within,
and listen for You to speak within my heart.
I will remember that light and dark are the same to You.
Use the darkness to build my trust in You.
Do you approach the unknown as a threat or with anticipation?
Talk to God about your fears, he is not surprised by them.
THE TENTH WAY: PERSEVERANCE
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. Romans 5:3-5
As your destination gets closer the terrain changes again and you are climbing uphill. Bethlehem sits on a mountain above the plains. Still the light of the Star guides you but you are tired, muscles strained, breath short. Growing towards God is no easy sprint. You’ve crossed rugged country, overcome thirst and hunger, fought off distractions and trudged through the dark. You travel lighter now having let go of nearly everything along the way. Along with exhaustion there is a strange sense of satisfaction, even pleasure. All the things you thought you couldn’t do without, you can live without; all you once thought mattered the most, doesn’t matter. You are free.
Faith has grown, and the two gifts which cannot be separated from it – hope and love. These three treasures are only available to those who persevere on the difficult inner journey of prayer. Persevere, with only the light of the Star to guide you, and Grace will meet you just beyond the next rise.
Lord, my mind is telling me to give up,
to find an easier path.
But deep inside I am even more sure that pursuing the Light
is worth all the effort, all the letting go, all the perseverance.
Faith, carry me these last few steps,
Hope, hold me,
Love, fill me.
Has persevering made you view the journey differently
from when you first started?
What things have become less important?
THE ELEVENTH WAY: FIRE
And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:17b-19
Those who keep on keeping on will come face to face with their hearts desire. It is not through speaking the correct words, or doing the correct things so that enlightenment suddenly is produced. No, instead your constant journeying finds its end in “the fullness of God.” But this is not a goal that is grasped for, that you can ‘manage’.
The eleventh way is the way of utter relinquishment. There is no further you can travel. You’ve come as near the Light as you can get on your own. You must now stop and sit still before Jesus. Ask nothing. Demand nothing. Accept whatever comes. Open the treasure chest of your heart offering the three gifts that have carried you here: gold of faith, frankincense of hope, myrrh of love. They are all you have now. And these too you must surrender to Jesus. Empty you wait, ready to receive what nothing can buy, earn, or comprehend. The warmth of God’s love will come how and when He chooses.
Lord, I’ve reached not only the end of my journey,
but the end of myself.
I’ll no longer try to decide when You come
or how it will be.
I’m willing to wait, just as I am.
Sit with a candle or cross in front of you and just be with
God.
Walk to somewhere with a view of a tree, park, river or
beach and ask God to show Himself through the nature
in front of you.
THE TWELFTH WAY: RETURN
The mystery that has been kept hidden for ages and generations, but is now disclosed to the Lord’s people. To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. Colossians 1:26-27
…they returned to their country by another route. Matthew 2:12
This, at last, is the mystery of Christmas, the heart of the journey. God became human that humanity may enjoy intimate fellowship with God – always. God in Christ and Christ in us, the full presence of God making a home in the human heart. This is more than the mind can take in. It is beyond reason and defies explanation. Only love can carry you to this inner place of prayer, this being-with-God that you were created for. Most of the time we live in a distant country, far from God and even far from our own selves, not present to the Presence.
This long journey to Bethlehem ends in realising that what you sought was not far away at all but as close as your own heartbeat. Multiple things took up your attention instead of the one thing that truly mattered. But now you have learnt to be present this is the essence of prayer.
So you don’t need to stay on this mountain. Go back to emails and grocery shopping, working and resting. But now you can take another way (Matt 2:12). Be fully present; don’t resist the moment, even if it seems awful. It seems awful largely because you want to be elsewhere – but God is there, not somewhere else. When you’re present, you are no longer haunted by the past or anxious about the future. You dwell with God, Who is as close as your hands and feet, as near as your next breath.
Lord, now I know that the journey is within,
through a vast interior landscape that I have largely ignored.
You wait like a visitor in my heart
while I am a distracted host, busy with many things,
but not present to the One my heart truly desires.
I will learn to be present to my daily world,
present to Your love
That the two may mingle and intertwine
That Your glory may be seen in all the earth.
