I went to a Boys High School (Nelson College). A school with a proud tradition of turning boys into men where tears were for third formers and you learnt to ‘suck it up’ and not display too many feelings. It is part of our Kiwi male culture but at times like we are going through now it encourages us to be less instead of more. One of the shortest and yet most powerful verses in the Bible is John 11 v 35. It is the easiest memory verse and shows the manliness of Jesus who seeing the grief of his friends was moved to tears himself. The verse simply says “Jesus wept” (John 11 v 35).
Another translation puts it like this:
“He stood. They watched. And the flow of words ceased, the flow of tears began. . . Jesus began to weep. So the Jews said, ‘See how he loved him’”.
Jesus showed enormous resolve and courage in his life even to the point of laying down his life, going to a cruel cross, for his friends. Yet he was also vulnerable and open to tears. This is not the only passage that shows Jesus crying; he weeps over Jerusalem and cries in the garden as well. Perhaps many times when he climbed the hills to pray alone he also wept. Can we allow ourselves to weep too?
In different ways we have all suffered loss and now 10 days later the emotions are catching up with us. Lets not push them down but have the courage of Jesus to let our emotions show. To cry is healthy. It can be a form of prayer (see Romans 8 v 23).
Each of us has within us a grief space like a small jar. Each drop of sadness and loss falls into this jar and slowly it fills up. Somewhere along the way our jar of grief and sadness overflows. We think we are doing fine and are OK and then suddenly the littlest of things can trigger tears and a deep sense of loss as our jar over flows. We need these times to healthily empty some of the grief from our lives. Don’t be surprised if something like this happens to you over the next couple of days. And if it does be gentle – let yourself cry and share your sadness with someone close and with God.
May God who made himself vulnerable and wept be with you today
Alan
